A Guide To Tantric Massage

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TANTRIC MASSAGE

I guess the majority of us have heard about Tantric sex and massage. Had anyone asked me what it was exactly I would have giggled shyly and muttered something about gentle touching, feathers, massage and no orgasm. How wrong I was.

Tantric massage is basically just a massage. However it was created from the belief that if you are sexually happy and relaxed then your health will benefit. The Hindus describe Tantra as achieving personal growth through pleasurable existence. The massage itself does tend to cause orgasms, but these are described as a bonus rather than the aim.

Although Tantric massage does not involve actual penetrative sex, it does involve full on touching of the organs. For this reason you will not find it offered down your local health centre. You are far more likely to find it on offer in the many massage parlours in London and other major cities.

If you want to have a go with her or him indoors here is a pretty basic guide to Tantric massage.

Firstly, from this point on, your manhood is referred to as Lingam (wand of light – don’t be thinking light sabre it’s not that big!) and the lady’s bits are called Yoni (sacred space or sacred temple). Let’s face it those words sound much nicer than the alternatives.

If you are visiting somewhere for your massage you need to decide in advance whether you will be getting naked or not. Proper Tantric masseuse prefer you to be naked, they believe this helps the healing process all over your body. If you are shy you can choose to keep some clothes on, I am guessing you will want to cover your Lingam or your Yoni. If you are at home with the missus or the husband, get your kit off and turn the heating up.

Choose some gentle music (whale music is optional). Now banish all thoughts of kneading your lover all over until she or he begs for mercy. It’s not that kind of massage. Make your lover lie on his or her back, legs apart and a cushion under the hips to raise up the Yoni/Lingam area and a cushion under the head so they can look at their genitals. Explain that although there will not be any penetrative sex this evening you will take them to previously unknown heights of sexual satisfaction. It may help to convince them if you do not print off this article and place it next to them on the bed. Choose your lubricant wisely; chocolate body sauce has no place here.

The massage itself involves every part of the body, although I guess the Yoni/Lingam area will receive more than its fair share of attention. The massaging of the body is to help prepare the receiver for the attention you will be paying their genitals.

Yoni Massage

Pour a small amount of oil on to the mound of the Yoni, just enough so it drips down the outer lips. Massage each outer lip slowly between thumb and forefinger, sliding up and down the entire length of the lip. Only ask your lover if the pressure is too much or not enough. Try to look into their eyes during the massage and ensure she can see what you are doing. Do the same for the inner lips of the Yoni. Take your time and watch your lover relax.

The jewel in the crown is the clitoris. Four times more sensitive that your Lingam so take it easy here. Begin by gently stroking it in a clockwise and anti-clockwise direction and squeeze it gently between your thumb and index finger. The missus will be well and truly fired up by now but try not to allow an orgasm just yet, let the sensations build. If it becomes too much, just back off a bit and encourage her to breathe deeply. Now insert the middle finger of your right hand (I can’t remember why it has to be the right one but I shouldn’t think it would cause too much trouble if you need to use your left instead.) and gently feel around inside continuing to massage gently.

With your palm facing upwards and your middle finger buried in the Yoni, bend your finger back towards the palm and you should feel a spongy area just under the pubic bone. This is known as the G-spot (“that’s where it is!” I hear you yell). Gently massage here, in circles, back and forth, side to side. Your lover may feel the need to pee but hopefully she should feel pleasure building slowly. At this point you may wish to insert the finger between your middle finger and your little finger. Whilst a few of your digits are employed inside, you may as well use your thumb to continue circling the clitoris. Another option is to leave your middle finger inside, continue stimulating the clitoris with your thumb and insert your little finger up her anus. I would suggest you perhaps test the waters first as anal penetration when you are not expecting it would definitely ruin the mood. Whilst all this is going on, your left hand may feel a little underused. Use it instead to continue stroking and massaging other parts of her body (her body parts not yours!). Your lover will more than likely experience a very intense orgasm and afterward will feel completely relaxed. She will generally drift off to sleep and leave you in a state of arousal with no prospect of a Lingam massage for you tonight!

Lingam Massage

Traditionally the giver, some men may find it difficult to lay back and think of England whilst his lover goes to work on his wand of light. However, I do suggest you give it a go bearing in mind the fantastic massage you gave her Yoni last night.

Get your man to lay back on the bed with a pillow under his head to enable him to see what you are doing. Put a pillow under his hips and spread his legs with his knees bent. His Lingam must be completely exposed. Begin as before by gently massaging all over his body, avoiding this area for a while. This allows him to become completely relaxed and prepared for the touching of the Lingam. Pour a small amount of oil over his shaft and testicles and begin gently massaging his testicles. Next massage the area on the pubic bone above the Lingam. Massage the area between his testicles and his anus (perineum). Moving on to the Lingam, gently grasp the base with your right hand and move up the shaft and then remove your hand, repeat with the left hand. Do this for some time, then change to grasping the Lingam at the top, slide down the shaft and remove your hand, replace with the left and repeat this process. The head of the Lingam is very sensitive and deserves special attention. Massage it in a circular motion. Don’t worry if the Lingam goes soft, it will shortly perk up again. Likewise if your partner seems to be on the brink of orgasm, back off and encourage deep breathing.

Keep bringing him close to orgasm and then back off. This is not a method of torture, it helps them to control their ejaculation and therefore achieve longer and more pleasurable orgasms. Whilst continuing to massage his Lingam, you can search for his sacred spot. This is located between his testicles and his anus. It is a small indentation about the size of a pea. If you massage here and gently increase the pressure he may well feel uncomfortable at first. Applying pressure here will help him gain control of his orgasms in future. If he is nearing ejaculation you can apply pressure here and this will increase the intensity of his orgasm.

The end of the massage is signalled by either ejaculation or snoring. If he is snoring you still have some practising to do. If he has ejaculated, you have some clearing up to do.

I am still very much a beginner however I was pleased to discover that Tantric massage is not a mysterious sexual cult and is certainly not difficult to do. Anyone with an hour to spare and a bottle of strawberry flavoured body oil can do it.

Everybody Poops – What Your Poop May Be Trying to Tell You

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I have to admit up front, this is going to be the crappiest article I’ve ever written.

You see, as I was walking my dogs Marty and Rosie the other day, it occurred to me that poop plays a huge role in my life. I’m not afraid to admit it. I pick up after my dogs every day, I scoop my cat’s litter box every day (OK, not EVERY day, but it certainly feels that way), and I talk with my clients about their bowel movements. In fact, while I was in India this past summer, poop was actually the number one topic of conversation between my colleagues and me, as we compared notes on who had diarrhea and who was still healthy. I even remained on “poop watch,” for several weeks after my return to the States, making sure that everything was OK (and thankfully, it was!)

So, if you are a pet owner, parent, health care professional, or world traveler, you probably know what I mean!

But many people don’t get to talk about poop as much as I do. I know this because when I ask people about their poop, I often get blank stares and uncomfortable looks. So, I let’s talk about all of the questions that people want answered but are usually afraid to ask. After all, your poop is an important indicator of your overall health!

What is Poop?

Have you ever wondered what poop actually is? About 75% of your average poop is water, although this will vary depending on the person. Water is absorbed out of fecal material as it passes through the large intestine, so the longer you take to “go,” the drier your poop will be.

The remaining 25% is comprised of dead bacteria that helped us digest our food, living bacteria, protein, undigested food residue (also known as fiber), waste material from food, cellular linings, fats, cholesterol, salts, protein, and substances released from the liver and the intestines (such as mucus).

What Makes a Healthy Poop?

Your feces are a clear indicator of the health of your gastrointestinal tract. Dr. Mehmet Oz says, “At the end of the day you can analyze your body really effectively by looking at what comes out of your body.”

So what should you look for? A healthy poop will be:

Golden brown, which is due to pigments formed by the bacteria in the gut and bile from the liver. You want to make sure the color is normal because that tells you a lot about what’s going on in your gastrointestinal tract (more on color below).

Formed into one long shape. Dr. Michael Levitt, an Australian colorectal surgeon who has written a book called The Bowel Book, says that the healthy human stool resembles the shape and consistency (although not the same color) of an unripe banana. Dr. Oz says ” You don’t want [pieces].” Some experts disagree, saying they don’t have to be well- formed. Patrick Donovan, N.D., a naturopath in Seattle, WA says “Stools don’t have to be well- formed logs. They can disperse in the toilet water; they can break down.”

Nearly odorless.

About 1 to 2 inches in diameter and 18 inches long.

What About Other Colors?

Sometimes we don’t see that “golden guru,” and are faced with something else instead. Here’s some insight into what those other colors might mean.

Black: Feces can be black if dried blood is present in it from internal bleeding in the upper digestive tract. See a doctor if this is the case.

Very Dark Brown: Drinking wine the night before may result in dark brown poop. This could also be the result of eating too much salt, or not enough vegetables.

Yellow: One condition that can cause yellow poop is an infection known as giardia, a dangerous infection that can spread to others. Another cause of yellow poop may be a condition known as Gilbert’s syndrome. See your doctor if you are consistently seeing yellow poop.

Green: Babies often have green poop when they are given food for the first time. Children may have green or blue poop from certain illnesses or from ingesting food colorings. Adults may also have green poop if they eat large amounts of green, leafy vegetables or if they eat large amounts of foods with green food coloring. Light green poop may indicate excessive sugar in the diet. Green feces can also occur with diarrhea if bile salts pass through the intestine unchanged. Again, see a doctor if you are concerned!

White/pale: Feces can appear white or pale after drinking barium sulfate, which is often given to patients getting an X-ray of the digestive tract. A white or pale stool may also be an indication of problems with the gallbladder or liver.

Red: Bright red in the feces may be indicative of active bleeding, possibly the result of hemorrhoids. A magenta color may result form eating intense red food coloring, or red foods such as beets.

How Often Should I Poop?

Ah – the big question! Experts disagree on how often a person should poop. The National Institute for Diabetes, Kidney, and Digestive Diseases says three times a week is normal and healthy for some people. According to Ayurveda, an ancient Indian healing system, once a day is ideal. Other experts advocate once or twice a day, while still others say a person should have a bowel movement within two to three hours of a major meal- -or two to three times a day. So you can see that it really depends on who you talk to. My personal opinion is that you above all want to be regular in your pooping schedule, and that one poop a day is ideal.

When someone poops four times a day or more and the poop has a liquid consistency, this is referred to as diarrhea. When someone poops less than two or three days a week and the poop is hard, dry, and difficult to pass, this is known as constipation.

What’s the Deal with Corn?

It’s funny, so it’s ok to laugh. But most people I know have experienced it and they ask why it is that when you eat corn, the next time you poop there it is again! There are a couple of reasons for this. One is that most of us do not thoroughly chew our food. Another interesting tidbit I’ve learned that there is an outer coating on corn that is made up of indigestible cellulose. This outer coating slips off the inner kernel and, since it’s indigestible, passes through the gut intact. It then emerges looking like a whole kernel, even though it’s just the outer skin. The inside of the kernel is starchy and digestible, and that is the part that we succeed in chewing and digesting.

Well, hopefully you know now a lot more about this important topic. And that’s the scoop on poop!